Fitness: An Escape

Some people tell me that I work out too much and spend too much time in the gym; but working out is an escape for me. The one time of the day where I can tune everything out, focus on my music, focus on what I’m lifting and how I’m feeling. I get to shut out the outside world; the negative thoughts, the self-doubt the endless worrying. I work so hard to achieve the body that I’ve always dreamed of having. Without the gym I feel lost, heavy-minded and lethargic.  Working out is an anti-depressant for me. I enjoy pushing myself to workout side by side with the men I go to the gym with, refusing to be treated less than a man. Now I can directly relate that into my life. Pushing myself to go and face my greatest fears in life; speaking in front groups of people, standing up for myself, making a effort to worry about my own feelings and well-being. Call it selfish, but sometimes being selfish can lead to self-actualization. Every fear I’ve had in life, big or small, I’ve pushed through. Even in the toughest of times, whether that be financially, mentally, emotionally or physically, I’ve pushed through.

I’ve been on this earth for 26 Years. In that time I’ve moved to Victoria on my own, I’ve travelled to Europe, the US, within Canada etc. I have undergone two major surgeries, both elective, and healed and pushed through both of those. I’ve recently just started doing something I’ve dreamed of, teaching at SPINCO. I’m in shock and awe because never in my wildest dreams did I think that I could be an instructor at SPINCO. Over half of my life was controlled by a negative and doubtful mindset. I was often paralyzed by fear… the sound of my voice, the way people might judge me and react negatively to my truth, but as once said “it takes courage to change hearts.” Every day I push myself to tell my truth and maybe I can help someone in my position. I couldn’t have done all of this without the help of my coaches and teammates throughout the years. I have been so fortunate that at every gym I have joined, I’ve been treated as an equal. My next goal is to be a coach for someone else. I want to give someone the courage and the strength to build up their mind, body and soul through hard work. I want to be an influencer, a mind changer. Watch out Kelowna, because I’m coming for you.

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